You’d think I’d learn by now. But nooooo. I get so many political emails each day, I get overwhelmed. They start by asking an innocuous question about where I stand on a particular issue. Then I naively answer. And up comes a donation box telling me that if I could just give as little as $5.00, I can both save the country AND my donation will be TRIPLED, but only if I act before midnight. So I leave the money, and the very next day I’m asked for more. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. But what happens if you try to fool me 13 times a week and twice on Sundays?

This is why God invented the “unsubscribe” button. You’d think it would be so easy to stop receiving these emails, but clearly it’s not. They ask you why. It’s like an ex-girlfriend or boyfriend you broke up with asking “But why?” Unfortunately the website unsubscribe choices don’t include any of the easy outs, like “It’s not you, it’s me,” or “I don’t deserve you,” or as an ex once said to me when I was trying to win my way back into her graces, “You wouldn't like me anymore.” No instead you are just faced with the brutal truth: “The ads are annoying,” “Too many ads,” “Subject matter not interesting,” etc. Think of saying that to an ex. “You’re annoying,” “You’re always bothering me,” “I am not interested in anything you have to say.” So I end up feeling sorry for the damn pollsters or whoever it is that keeps bothering me. When they ask, “Are you sure?” Or “Won’t you reconsider?” or, “What happened?” I often break down and stop going through with the unsubscribe. And is that even a word?

There’s also this: the more steps they make you go through in order to unsubscribe, the more likely you are to say, “The hell with it!” and stop answering their endless questions and, therefore, refrain from unsubscribing. I prefer the websites that go out with a touch of class. You know them. They’re the ones that just immediately answer you back with a “You have successfully unsubscribed. Sorry to see you go.”

Consider this classy way I once handled a rare New 60 unsubscribe. It was from a former fan who told me she could make the strip into an animated cartoon on tv. She tried but was not successful. A couple months later I saw she had unsubscribed. And I responded with class, the way I’d like to be treated when I unsubscribe. I simply, classily replied, “What the !*?!@.”

As we move into February it’s staying light outside a little longer and spring will get here one of these days. We will see you again next week with the final installment in the Unsub Series and a quick trip to the land of home improvement. Have a great weekend,

Andy and John