On leftovers and resolutions 1/10/20

If you are like either of us, you hosted a New Year’s Eve party and on January 1 (and who’s kidding, on Jan 2 and maybe even the 3rd) you started making your way through the leftovers. Partly because you become tired of having to move the roasted vegetables, guacamole and sour cream in order to get to the milk. And partly because you have had enough brie for a month, and want to get to the old fasioned cheddar. Besides, brie sucks when served cold. The urge to clear, coupled with the urge to not waste, results in some hilariously mismatched dinners. And champagne? Forget about it. Who wants to open a nice bottle of Moet or Veuve Cliqout, when you’ll have to dump whatever isn’t drunk? Pro tip: This is why the good lord invented prosecco, which retails for $12.99. If you’re just drinking mimosas, says that’s definitely the way to go. Take it from Andy, who had several while watching college football games he cared nothing about.

Which brings us to resolutions. Ah yes, the New Year’s resolution list. Is there anything more meaningless? Practically every gym in America is packed to the gills through the first two weeks of January, and then…you can have your pick of any treadmill in the place, or any elliptical, except the one that also goes sideways, that’s mine goddamnit!

John and I both come from the world of advertising so we know the signs of waning resolutions. In the beginning of January, almost every commercial is for Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, Nutrisystem or the Equinox Gym. A couple weeks later it’s all about McDonalds McRib Sandwich back for only $1.99 as well as the Applebee’s $8.99 lunch special, not to mention the Red Lobster all-you-can-eat Shrimpfest. Ok, we mentioned it but the point is, when that stuff looks gross even on tv, you know it’s gonna even be worse in person.

So here’s to next year’s 2021 resolutions when we vow to lose another 20 pounds each and really, really go to the gym a lot, we swear.

Happy New Year and see you next week.

Andy and John