Politically Correct Week

Another week, another blog about Politically Correct language. Because that’s what happens when you create a 3-part series dealing with the same topic. To be fair, we grew up in the 50’s and 60’s and some of our language was unintentionally horrible. Guys were accused of “throwing like a girl.” I also remember going to a Mets game in the Polo Grounds, which was a rectangle, not exactly an ideal shape for baseball. The foul poles were very short. You only had to hit a ball 258 feet to hit a homerun to right field. This was considered a “cheap” home run. In our infinite racial stupidity, we called them “Chinese” homers. Because back then, we considered things made in China to be cheap. It’s really disgusting, but the interesting part is that my friends and I had absolutely no idea we were being offensive. We heard an older kid say it, thought it was cool, and then we said it. Why is the bad kid always called the “black” sheep of the family? Did you know when you say somebody “gypped” you, that you are being offensive to gypsies? When you call a certain person’s remarks “tone deaf,” you are being offensive to deaf people or the hearing impaired? A “basket case” came from World War I referring to a soldier who had lost all four limbs and had to be carried in a basket. The “rule of thumb” apparently comes from a 1600’s English Law that allowed men to assault their wives with a stick, so long as it was no wider than a thumb. Yikes. We can’t all possibly know all these phrases and where they come from, but some of them, well…

True story. I once went to an Acura dealer in Westchester County where I live and started to negotiate on the final price on an Acura sedan. The salesman apparently wasn’t in a negotiating mood when he said, “Don’t try to Jew me down.” Seriously. I got more than a little pissed when I told him, “You know I’m Jewish.” He turned the color of a sheet and claimed, “I said CHEW me down.” I said goodbye and headed straight for Subaru. Having said all of this, I think there is a major difference between being unintentionally offensive (okay until it’s pointed out) and being intentionally offensive (never okay). We’re just picking out a few examples to keep you on your toes. As has been frequently suggested to me, “maybe you’d be better if you just kept your mouth shut.” That’s it for this week. We’ve got one more example next week and then we’re going on a 4-part journey to watch Al attempt a new skill with very mixed results. Have a great weekend,

Andy and John

BLOG APRIL 14

Oftentimes the inspiration for a comic comes from real life. Sometimes it comes from my life or John’s directly. This is one of those times. For those of you who are a bit behind on your blog reading, I was experiencing a little shortness of breath and made the (depending on how you look at it) brilliant or dumb decision to mention it to my wife. Before I knew it, she was whisking me into the big city (Manhattan) to see her (and now my) cardiologist. I didn’t think much of it at the time, but you know how they ask all these intake questions? “How tall are you?” (I say 5’6” but have apparently shrunk to 5’5”). “How much do you weigh?” (I say 164 when it’s more like 165 and possibly even 166 if you must know the absolute, unvarnished truth). But then the questions led to health, like “how many drinks do you have in an ordinary week?” and, “Do you smoke?” To which I add,

“E-cigarettes don’t count, right?” At any rate my wife Joanie set the record straight on every one of these questions. When I mentioned this to John, he knew we had a comic. And listen I’m all for turning life experiences into comics, but I don’t know if the scare and aggravation of having a stent put into one of your arteries was worth a good comic, but now that the deed is done, I’m gonna go with, yes it was worth it. Kinda.

Our other comic came right from the world of Political Correctness. It is a pet peeve of John’s and mine to hear anyone butcher the English language by saying things like “Overexaggerate” or “I could care less,” when they mean “exaggerate” or that you “COULDN’T care less.” Fair warning-we will call you on it. But equally ridiculous is this super sensitivity to politically correct language. Some of it makes a ton of sense but when one State Legislature wanted to change the term “women” to “people with uteruses,” I cringed.  We are also big baseball fans and when PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) got upset about the term “bullpen,” I rolled my eyes. For those of you who don’t know, the bullpen is where a team’s relief pitchers sit. If they are needed to enter the game in the later innings, the manager makes a “call to the bullpen.” Well PETA brought up that the term originated from the cruel sport of bullfighting, and it was offensive to (bulls???). The bulls, some of which get repeatedly stabbed by the matadors, stay in a “bullpen” until they are made to enter the ring. Okay, But PETA suggested that Major League Baseball change the term to “Arm Barn.” I kid you not. In the next few comics, we’re going to take a crack at explaining some of the new changes being suggested by the critics. Maybe you’re wondering, what does this have to do with being older? And if you’re asking, we’re answering. If you have millennial children, how many times have you heard, “You can’t say that dad (or mom). Master Bedroom connotes slavery, Indian giver disrespects Indians who aren’t Indians but Native Americans in the first place!  You get the idea. We’re just trying to perform a public service so you dear readers don’t fall into the trap of making these verbal faux pas. You’re welcome. Have a great weekend and be sure to root your favorite team on from the Arm Barn.

See you next week,

Andy and John

The Making of a Comic Strip

When you create a comic strip you are always on the lookout for material that can be turned into a funny idea- for instance...a dinner with friends, a menu with tiny type and a single pair of reading glasses getting passed around. Andy says, “It’s kinda like passing a joint around...” Ding, Ding, Ding... no more calls please, we have a winner! And it becomes this: 

An unfortunate encounter with one of those new phone app parking meters gets a similar treatment: 

Show up at the wrong funeral home... (yes, it actually happened) and you end up with this comic:

Like the comics above, the inspiration for many of the strips are things that have actually happened to one of us or a story we’ve heard or something we’ve read or seen on tv or... well anything at all really. They are then comedically embellished for your viewing pleasure.

So how do we get from “hey, this might be funny” to a finished strip? It starts with a few notes jotted down in Andy’s notebook, or a story about something that happened that weekend or a thumbnail that John has scribbled on a random scrap of paper like the one below, inspired by a Candy Store in Great Barrington, MA. 

These notes, scraps, thumbnails etc. are just a place to start- we then proceed to tweak dialogue,  argue about things like whether the number 6 is funny (it’s not), come up with new jokes, throw away others and generally try to dial up the humor to get to something we both think is funny. When we can’t agree, we resolve things in a professional manner-we wrestle for it. Greco-Roman style, best two out of three falls wins. 

You’ve probably heard the expression, “It practically writes itself!” That is an inane expression- it never happens like that. 

Once we’ve worked out a few ideas we like (or at minimum, two ideas we like) it’s time to get going on the artwork. SInce Andy’s artistic skill is limited to drizzling balsamic reduction across fresh buffalo mozzarella, the bulk of the artwork responsibility is handled by John, with the exception of the lettering and final color work which is shipped out to a sweatshop in the Philippines. No, just kidding about that... we would never take advantage of underage factory workers toiling in unsafe conditions. Besides, the comics came back with waaay too many misspellings...

When the dialogue is more or less agreed upon, it gets put into balloons in a rough pencil to make sure it fits into the 13 x 4 inch format, seen below: 

At this stage the dialogue and scenes are broken up into frames, making sure that the story is clear and the joke is paid off.  The pencil is then reviewed by the Office of Standards and Practices and returned with instructions to replace any nudity and/or profanity with modest clothing and/or grawlixes accordingly (see example below)

If any reference photos are needed (as in this case) a quick Google image search provides anything we need:

Next, the pencil gets tightened up, finalizing facial expressions, gestures, background details, etc.

Inking and lettering- still going old school with this: an assortment of markers and Japanese brush pens. Someday soon... iPad Pro and Procreate.

All inked and lettered and ready to scan...

After scanning, Photoshop color layers are added, url, copyright... and then... it’s done! Except, of course for posting on Facebook, website, Instagram, Twitter...

That’s pretty much it.  Until we have to start the next one. 

If you’ve read this far (God bless you) please let us know what you think by leaving a comment below.

But please, keep the nudity and profanity to a minimum.

Andy and John